The holiday season can be an exciting time of year. Cooler air, festive decorations, holiday music and the comforting flavors of hot chocolate and apple cider makes it feel magical. However, for parents and kids it can bring stress, especially when life circumstances add extra pressure.
Common stressors during the holidays can be related to:
- Changes in routine
- Traveling
- Missing family members and loved one
- Pressures to create meaningful experiences
- Family dynamics
- Holiday shopping and gift giving
So what can parents do? How can we help our children process pressures to protect their mental health and emotional well-being?
Communicate Expectations
Planning ahead and explaining arrangements can help prepare kids for traveling, adjusting routines, meeting new people and more.
“Kids love to know what to expect,” Ashley Pagenkopf, MS, CCLS, child life specialist in Cook Children’s Emergency Department, said. “Establishing realistic expectations is the most practical tip I would offer to families. Kids thrive with boundaries and expectations.”
When visiting family and friends or even hosting a holiday reunion at home, communicating with kids about who they may meet is important.
“A huge help for kids is to have video chats with family members and friends they will see in advance,” Lisa Elliott, Ph.D., psychologist and manager of Cook Children’s Behavioral Health Clinic in Denton, suggests. “For littles, even reading books to them over video chat is a great way to engage them.”
Let your children know that feeling anxious around unfamiliar people is normal. Staying together as a family can help kids feel safe, and it’s important to remind them they can speak up if they feel uncomfortable or need a break from social gatherings.
Practice Self-Care
Managing family anxiety often begins with parents addressing their own stress.
“Kids are very good at reading adult emotions even if they are not verbally expressed, so if you are stressed out, it’s likely your child is anxious as well,” Cook Children’s psychiatrist Akemi Watkins, M.D., said. “It’s like the safety message on airplanes where you have to put the oxygen mask on yourself first before your child.”
Simple self-care practices can significantly enhance parents’ well-being. Prioritizing sleep, nutritious meals and regular exercise can make a big difference. For more information about self-care for parents, Cook Children’s has a guide of resources listed here.
Focus on Connection
One of the best ways to reduce holiday stress is to focus on connection. Finding ways to bring family and friends together can be fun and meaningful.
“I’ve had multiple kids share their favorite family traditions,” Dr. Elliot said. “Experiences like taking baked goods, lotions or other treats to a nursing home, helping in a soup kitchen serving holiday meals and even adopting a family and going shopping together for them.”
The holiday season presents an opportunity to teach children about generosity – a concept that studies show actually improves mental health. Doing things for others makes you feel good – emotionally and physically.
It also promotes empathy and resilience, which are important building blocks to emotional and mental strength and coping skills that help children deal with challenges.
To learn more about stress-related issues go to stress.org
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